This week I had a melt down.
A probably long deserved melt down. new mom (again) of 2 doing it all alone See my relationship (or lack there of) with my children's dad has been worsening over the last few months. I would actually say that during the entire 2nd and 3rd trimester with my son we rarely saw one another... we rarely spoke to one another. I negatively reacted to very hurtful statements said by my children's father. I took to social media to react, It was childish, immature and petty but real nonetheless.., Im working on healing my heart from rejection and pain while raising 2 little people, working to advance my career and keeping up on my own personal self care. Forgiving the very person I loved with all my heart has been a very long, daunting process that in hind sight is changing me to become a better version of self. The last two days I have engaged myself with youth revival at church. The message dealt with "Who does God Say i am?" facing rejection and acceptance. Of course my homegirl invited me to present my testimony to the congregation. I was nervous. Getting nervous is usually not a characteristic of mine, after all I am a teacher! My testimony was filled with memories of dealing with rejection as a young person, and still dealing with rejection as an adult, Through the years I have been fortunate to NOT allow rejection stop me from growing. Instead Ive used rejection as a way to continuously become better versions of myself. Rejection has taught me to keep my head up ( even when my heart has been broken into a million pieces). Rejection continues to teach me how to forgive. Rejection has brought me closer to God. God continues to show me favor. God continues to accept me and all my flaws.
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@iampumalagos AuthorIm the mama of Marli Amor and Kingston Ase. Archives
June 2020
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